A mother’s nightmare

I dreamed last night that I got arrested. I can’t remember what I did wrong, but it was for some minor offense, probably traffic-related. Robby was with me but he was a little kid again, five or six years old–and he looked like his older brother, Chris, when he was that age, so cute and little-boy-tough with his long, strawberry hair and jeans jacket.

It was after midnight, and Robby/Chris was nodding off every few seconds, poor kid, as we waited in some kind of holding cell with many other offenders. Someone unlocked the gates and told the men to walk down a dark, descending corridor for arraignment, and the women to go down another corridor. Never having been arrested or arraigned before, I have no idea what these things are like, but it seemed quite normal in my dream.

I turned to take Robby/Chris’s hand, but he was bravely walking down the men’s ramp, too tired to notice that I wasn’t next to him. In the chaos, I called to him but he didn’t seem to hear me, and I couldn’t get through the crowd of criminals to catch up to him.

“Robby!” I screamed as he got farther away, but I could see that he was stumbling along half-asleep. I began to panic, imagining what some of these men might do to him in the dark. Two drunken young men accosted me, laughing to see a woman in this place.

“Hey, baby,” one of them said, reaching for me, “you’re in the wrong line.”

Now I could no longer see Robby. I started to cry.

“I’ve lost my little boy. Please help me,” I begged.

He stopped laughing and looked at me seriously. He started to say something, like he might help, but I don’t know what he would have said because suddenly I was staring at a picture on a wall. It took me a few seconds to recognize the picture and the wall next to my bed, and then to realize that it had all been a very, very bad dream.

I have never been so happy to wake up in my life.

[Update: Today is my birthday--the big six-oh. How could I forget? My son Chris, all grown up now, and his wife Karen took me out to Forever Fondue--OMG, you must go. It was a lovely evening, full of good talk, laughter and memories. I'm so glad they decided to move to San Diego.]