Waiting is hard work

In the past three weeks, I have gone through a lot of stuff:

1. Went to disability hearing and learned that I was approved.
2. Waited for the money.
3. Roommate moved out without notice.
4. Scrambled to borrow enough to pay rent.
5. Waited for the money.
6. Moved my desk/computer/stuff out of R’s room.
7. Enjoyed having my own space again.
8. Scrambled to find/order birth certificates so $SS could start.
9. Ran out of money.
10. Miraculously got enough money to keep going.
11. Tried and failed to do yoga. Kept trying and failing. Sometimes succeeded.
12. Tried and failed to do Morning Pages. Kept trying and failing. Sometimes succeeded.
13. Felt more exhausted than I’ve ever felt in my life.
14. Went to doctor and found out I have another UTI. Got meds.
15. Got doctor to fill out forms and sent applications for student loan cancellations.
16. Tried to help R decide whether to stay in school or go back to homeschooling.
17. Promised I would support him in whatever he decides.
18. Regretted being so supportive and wished I’d ordered him to stay in school.
19. Made a list of all the things I want to buy when the money comes.
20. Comparison shopped and decided which big-ticket items to buy.
21. Waited for the money to come.
22. Wondered what I’m going to do with myself now that I don’t have money to worry about or a disabled roommate to take care of any more.
23. Panicked over not having anything to worry about any more.
24. Laughed at self.
25. Decided to write a book.
26. Panicked over having to write a book.
27. Decided to focus on my health.
28. Quit sugar & caffeine. Again. Still going through withdrawal.
29. Joined Overeaters Anonymous online group.
30. Waited for money to come.

[Forgot to mention:
*Suddenly remembered I was supposed to file three past-due tax returns by the next day.
*Figured three years' worth of taxes by myself in one day.
*Got to IRS office and discovered I'd forgotten the returns.
*Told them my mistake and got a days' reprieve.
*Went back next day.
*Phew.
*Now the state of California has filed a tax lien against me.
*Ack!]